Thursday, June 23, 2011

These shoes don’t need no alibi!

Somehow someone at Saucony thought it would be a good idea to send me a pair of their Saucony Hattori shoes to review. I guess they thought this would be a good marketing opportunity. They must have missed the fact that I post about as frequently as a bear poops during hibernation and the fact that most of my posts are riddled with sarcasm and scat humor, or maybe they’re just into that kind of thing. Since I’m not one to turn down a free pair of shoes, I agreed.

I missed the part of the e-mail where they told me that these were minimalist shoes and also the part where they told me that the shoes were hideous. I used to have a pair of water shoes that I wore to the beach when I was a kid that looked just like these and every time I see pictures of myself wearing them I cringe. As you can see from the picture the shoes don’t have laces they use Velcro to attach themselves to your feet. That would be really cool if I needed to get them on quickly for an emergency, like if my boat was sinking over a rocky seabed but even then I’d probably still look around to see if I could borrow a pair of my wife’s shoes first. (Full disclosure: I do not own a boat.)

I’m probably not a great test subject for these kind of shoes because I really like my running shoes to correct my over-pronation. I like the motion control, the stability and the heel cushioning that my current shoes provide and I like to feel the reverberations crash up my leg as my heel strikes the pavement first. It just feels right. I guess I’m not much of a minimalist. In fact I’d go so far as to say that I’m a maximalist; it’s the American way! I want a bigger house, a faster car, more money and bigger shoes that do more for me. More is always better! (Notable exceptions: bikinis and cavities.)

Nevertheless, I wanted to give Saucony a fair shake and try the shoes because despite the tone of this post I really do like Saucony. Naturally, before running in minimalist shoes for the first time I wanted to take some precautions so I made sure to go run when I thought the fewest amount of people would be around to see me in these disastrously ugly shoes. I also took my dog with me so that anyone that did see me would look at the cute dog and not notice my ugly, ugly shoes. Initially I felt like I was coming down hard on my heel but that went away after only a quarter mile. I went 4 miles and felt fairly confident that I hadn’t changed my stride too drastically but for the next couple of days my calves were screaming so I had obviously been compensating.

While I’m not a fan of the shoes or of minimalist running in general I am a fan of strengthening my calves so I’ll probably continue to take short sporadic runs in the Saucony Hattori shoes, but mostly after dark when no one’s around to see me.

If you’re looking for a good review of these shoes by someone who is actually a minimalist you should check out http://minimalistrunningshoes.org/saucony-hattori-shoe-review.


12 comments:

  1. are you freakin kidding me?

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  2. There's a massive karmic imbalance in the world if an evil money-grubbing banker who posts less frequently than I do STILL gets free stuff sent to them. WTF, dude!

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  3. I wouldn't even wear those to the beach. I'm pretty sure the ugly would still show through the beach sand.

    Nice review, hippie.

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  4. i agree about u just wearing them in the dark. that seems like a good idea. ;)

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  5. SOLD! They got to be good if you hate 'em. I would totally wear those ... that is, if Saucony sent them to me for free.

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  6. I think to truly understand how ugly they are you would need to post a picture of you in them. Ha!

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  7. Dude, if they're a size 12 you can send em to me. I'll take em. Even pay you for shipping. :)

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  8. They are UGA colors. I wouldn't wear them just for that.

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  9. Has anyone called Spiderman, you've found his shoes?

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  10. Seriously, I've said it before and I'll say it again- super minimalist running shoes all look like outer-space alien bananas to me. Or outer-space alien reproductive organs. Either one! I'm glad to you call them out on their fugliness!

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  11. It'll be a while until I give up some serious cushioning, but at least these will be as light as they get. In terms of how they look, who cares, they'll soon be muddied up!

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