Friday, January 8, 2010

Goals, Resolutions and Various Other Lies

I know you’re all thinking “oh great, another post containing goals and resolutions. I just can’t get enough of other people’s goals and resolutions.” First of all, you can keep your sarcasm to yourself because I’m already up to my eyeballs in it. Second of all, if I don’t post my annual goals there would be no opportunity for another FAIL riddled post at the end of the year and I’d really hate to deprive all of you jackals of another chance to engage in the schadenfreude of commenting on my year in review post.

Without further ado, here are my 2010 goals or resolutions or whatever else you want to call them (you might also want to call them laughable, or unattainable):

Post more frequently this year Admittedly two posts in eight days isn’t a great start but I’d like be back around 200 posts for the year. This is a dangerous resolution as it potentially leads to quantity over quality, which is something I’m leery of. If you don’t have time to write something and you can’t think of anything to write about, then you probably shouldn’t put up a post just to comply with some arbitrary goal. Those posts are like junk miles, except without the maintenance benefits that you might get from junk miles, so... really... not at all like junk miles. I guess they’re more like your appendix or the time you spend reading this blog; completely useless. These are the posts that clog up my reader every year when NaBloPoMo comes along, but don’t get me started on that.

Run a sub 50 minute 10k I still want to do this, so let’s carry this one over from last year.

Set a new Tripple 7k PR Another carryover. The half marathon distance is still my favorite distance to race.

Set a new 5k PR Despite my struggles this year I still managed to hover within 20 - 30 seconds of my 5k PR. With some hard work and dedication I think I could set a new 5k mark for myself. (Note: I had to look up how to spell ‘hard work and dedication’ because those words are not a regular part of my vocabulary.)

Run some different races Every year I seem to run the same races because I’ve enjoyed them in the past, but then I exhaust my racing budget and don’t do any new races. This year I want to run at least 3 new races that I’ve never run before. Of course, I’ll still run the Bolder Boulder 10k but I’m not committing to repeating any other races. I have to run the Bolder Boulder because it’s just a big Memorial Day party and many of my ‘non-running’ friends also run the race. Beating all of my non-running friends allows me to hold it over them for yet another year and makes up for them all being smarter and better looking than me. I know you’re probably skeptical that I have friends and especially ones that are better looking than me (Non! C’est pas possible! - Pardon my French.) but it’s true, we are beautiful people, like a real life version of the cast of Friends.

Finally, in honor of the failures chronicled in my last post I leave you with this video of the best fails of 2009 (via WL). Fortunately none of my fails were big enough to make the highlight reel. (Note: There’s some NSFW language at the beginning so crank up the volume if you’re at work.)


  1. My french is a bit rusty, but I do believe it's 'ce n'est pas possible'.

    Way to start off the year with a nice fat french fail. :)

  2. Fantastic vid, just the right start for the weekend.

    Great goals, too!

  3. Xenia, your French is rusty. While it would be grammatically correct to state it as you did the French typically drop the ne (or in this case n’) when speaking, except in formal circumstances. Since I was using it in an expressive statement I felt OK with the informal usage of the phrase. Also, stick it in your ear!

  4. Great goals but even greater FAIL's! OMG LMFAO!!!!!!

  5. I'm sorry, what did you say? The stench of French pretension in here is making my eyes burn.

  6. I always feel bad laughing at those videos because some of those people look like they really got hurt but damn they're funny.

  7. I had my appendix removed 22 years ago and never missed it. Useless except, of course, it almost killed me.

  8. Watching people get hurt online is almost as fun as watching people get hurt in real life.

  9. You will get all of your goals for the year! Good luck with all of them! :D

  10. And thank you for that Best Fails of 2009 video. We humans are so stupid, but so entertaining...

  11. Thank goodness you posted a third blog this month to make my mocking of your lack of posting seem so ridiculous. I feel the shame.

    Let me know if want to race me this year. Some good old fashioned trash talking might motivate your sorry ass. Cheers!

  12. 3 posts in 12 days?

    I think you've still got me beat. I have only been posting about once a week.

  13. Get after it! Oh, you could do the Runnin' of the Green 7k and set a new PR, if you have not run a 7k.

    Plus, the Runnin' of the Green 7k is easy to PR, because it's not even a 7k, it's about a quarter of a mile short. I guess after 22 years they still can't get the distance right.

    See you at the races.


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