Thursday, May 21, 2009

Race Goals and Pipe Dreams

As you already know, Candis and I will be running the Bolder Boulder on Monday. If you too will be celebrating Memorial Day by cursing at your alarm clock and then running 10,000 meters feel free to stop by and say hello to us after the race. Unless of course, you’re rising early and running 10,000 meters somewhere that’s not in Boulder, CO, then don’t bother stopping by to say hello because that’s just going to waste your Memorial Day. We’ll be in the lower half of section 108 drinking beer at 8:30 in the morning (now I remember why I like running so much). Just look around until you see a couple that looks like Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie because if there’s a couple there that looks like that, there’s a pretty good chance we’ll be sitting behind them, staring. Or just look for us, that might be easier. I’d tell you what we’ll be wearing but do you really think we plan what we’re wearing that far in advance? OK you’re right, we totally do. I’ll be wearing a black and grey CU shirt and Candis will either be wearing a pink shirt or her Kiss My Asthma shirt. Also, don’t be fooled by amateur imitators who are only running 5,000 meters on Memorial Day. Get that weaksauce outta’ here!

I’ve already stated my goal is to run a sub 50 minute 10K but Candis’ goal of a sub 60 minute 10K has remained a secret up until roughly 3 seconds ago when I JUST SAID IT! Maybe 8 seconds ago for some of you slower readers. I also mentioned earlier this week (Bolder Boulder Week!) that there would be an advanced handicapping system that would allow Candis to compete against me. Originally I thought we could take the first place men’s and women’s finish times from last year and use the difference as a deduction from Candis’ time but it turns out that I thought that without really thinking much and the difference is obviously not big enough to make us even. (It’s only 3 to 4 minutes.) Since our goal times are exactly 10 minutes apart I’m going to attempt to finish 10 minutes ahead of Candis (hey, just like in the bedroom!) and she’s going to try to finish less than 10 minutes behind me. See, I told you it was an advanced handicapping system, well it was advanced for you 8 second people. Basically it will come down to who beats their goal by the most, or maybe, who misses their goal by the least. Loser has to have sex with the winner. (I just threw that in there to see if Candis was paying attention.)

I ran some intervals last night to see how my g-g-groin injury responded to speed and there was virtually no pain at all. It was a little tender this morning so I’m just going to make sure and rest for a couple of days before the race. I’m pretty sure it won’t be a problem on race day but if you think for one second that I won’t use it as an excuse come Tuesday morning then you’ve seriously misunderestimated me. Although... it wouldn’t hurt to have a back-up excuse at the ready since I’ve kind of confessed that the g-g-groin injury shouldn’t be a problem. Hmmm, maybe I could use one of these excuses... or maybe I’ll eat some spicy Mexican food the night before the race.


  1. There is the possibility that the spicy Mexican food will give you a possible gas-fueled turbo boost. Or, you know, you might crap your pants. Interesting gamble.

  2. ZOMG!!1! Candis thinks she can run a 01k in 06 minutes?!1!?

    (You didn't account for us numerically dyslexic readers, did you?)

    Interesting ... I went for the numbers joke ... Xenia went for the poop joke.

    That sounds about right.

  3. The thought of beer post-running makes me want to hurl, but if anyone can do it up right, it's Team Vanilla.

  4. At least when I lose, it won't be to a girl. Start the "Go Candis" chants!

  5. I'll look for you in the gray tshirt because I'm pretty sure you'll stand out amongst the 55,000+ runners. I'll be the one with the two whining children. I'll also be drinking my beer and any one else who donates to me their beer. The only reason I run the BB is so I can have an excuse to drink that early. Good luck!

  6. If you pull this out, I'll meat punch myself.

    Good luck Candis. My g-g-groin and I are counting on you.

  7. I'm not buyin' the Mexican Food excuse. I ate hot wings the night before my second marathon and PR'd by tweny minutes.

  8. I vote for a post-race joint race report.

    And now, hopefully people googling both "beer post-running" and "post race joint" will happily find their way to this blog.

  9. Good luck! I'll try to stop by after the race to say hello. I'll be the blonde looking around like an idiot trying to locate you both. Lol!

    See you then!

  10. remember, if all else fails, cheat! run well both of you!!!

  11. 10K pfft... I'll be doing my first half this weekend in Baaahston. Of course there is the altitude factor, which MIGHT just make us even.

    Good luck!


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