Thursday, May 31, 2007
Mile 1 8:34
Mile 2 9:07
Mile 3 9:15
Mile 4 9:07
Mile 5 8:55
Mile 6 9:20
Last 0.2 1:42 - Not posted. I used my deductive reasoning skills (read: calculator) to get this split.
After I finished, I saw a sign that read "Can't wait for your splits, text your bib number to 94827 and we'll send them to you." Editors Note, the number has been changed to protect the incompetent. So I text my bib number and get a text message back after a couple of minutes that reads "Thx [sic] 4 participating. U [sic] will receive ur [sic] splits when u [sic] finish the 2007 BolderBOULDER." What? I didn't really finish? I gave some serious thought to jumping the railing and crossing the finish mat again. By the way I’m still awaiting that text with my splits. Let’s hold our breath shall we.
Later we headed over to the post race expo where I found out that they were not able to print out our results just yet. Shocking, I know. All was not a loss though because I did buy the awesome ‘Sea Level is for Sissies’ T-shirt that you see in the picture. The folks from the Denver Marathon were handing out registration forms and encouraging people to sign up for the Denver Marathon on October 14th. Gee, let me think. I’m pretty beat right now after 6 miles do I like the idea that I’d still have another 20 miles left to run? Nope, sure don't. Whoever came up with this marketing strategy should be shot. Speaking of poor marketing decisions feast your eyes on this disaster from 1984.
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
You’re just going to have to trust me that I already had this idea a while ago because Australian running blogger MorseyRuns already put together a humorous pre-race checklist right here, and beat me to it. [Begin fake Aussie accent] “I throw another shrimp on the barbie and raise a glass of Castlemaine XXXX in your honor.” [/accent] You can (and should) check out her blog.
In the future you can expect that at some point I will post something similar to this only it will probably be a giant let down now that you’re expecting it and I’ve already exposed you to MorseyRuns’ humorous recounting of it. Awww crap!
I hereby, renounce all originality points for this idea.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Editor's Note: This is a pretty long post. I had a lot I wanted to say. Sue me. Sometime around dark-thirty yesterday morning my wife rolled over and started pushing me out of bed, it was time to get up and go run the Bolder Boulder Memorial Day 10K. Our kids stayed at their grandparents house last night which means that this is a prime opportunity to sleep in! If you don't have kids then you have no idea how cruel this is. It's kind of like when your favorite charity needs a big screen TV so you go out and buy them a state of the art flat screen. Yeah it's a great TV, better than yours even, but you don't get to use it and you're the one who's out 6 grand. I'm told that I'm supposed to feel good about helping others or something. Whatever. Being munificent isn't making my picture look any sharper. OK so it's not at all like that, but there's apparently some kind of irony thing going on. Eh, maybe I'm just in a bad mood because, who gets up this early on Memorial Day? To go running? I'm beginning to question my sanity.
First thing I notice is that it's hot. I'm going to estimate that it was around 97 degrees in the shade despite the fact that all credible sources are saying it was 84 degrees at the start of the race.
Mile 1 - 8:34. I’m off to a quick start, out in front of my wave. I’m feeling good, feeling strong. There's a guy in a giant hot dog suit, emphasis on the word 'hot' and I'm guessing that he didn't try it on prior to running in it this morning because it comes down so low that with every step the foam suit bounces up off his calves until the armholes jam up into his armpits. As I pass him I notice that as the suit bounces his face disappears from the face hole too. I'm just about to tell him "man, that must suck," but he knows that. He doesn't need me to tell him.
Mile 2 - 9:07. I’m trying now to temper my enthusiasm and settle into my pace. Still feeling good, I pass a group of obese belly dancers standing outside a house 'entertaining' the runners. My eyes take a second before the horror sets in and I quickly move from one belly dancer to the next hoping to find something that looks a little less like cottage cheese and more like a flat stomach or a six pack. No, no, no, no, yes! There it is, a six pack of Coors Light tucked covertly under the lawn chair where one of the dancers is taking a cigarette break. Poor thing. She must be all tuckered out from shakin' what her mama gave her, or more aptly what McDonald's gave her.
Mile 3 - 9:15. We’re headed up hill and my quads are starting to burn. I try to keep pushing on at this pace. Some college students are trying to recruit runners to do the slip-n-slide in their yard. I gave it a thought, but chances are pretty good that once I got to the end of it I'd just lie in the cool puddle of not-running-bliss until someone rolled me out of the way.
Mile 4 - 9:07. I try to rest my legs on the short down hill portions and push myself on the up hills, but I can feel my pace slowing. Another group of chubby belly dancers are cheering runners on. What is going on? Did I get lost and run this street twice? Is it possible that there are two separate groups of "big-boned" belly dancers tormenting runners today? Answer: yes.
Mile 5 - 8:55. I start making my way over to the left side of the street in anticipation of the upcoming turn. Here it comes, it's a right turn! I have no idea where I am despite being pretty familiar with the area and having run this event the past 2 years. My mind can't put a coherent thought together right now. The heat is really getting to me. Don't think, just run.
Mile 6 - 9:20. My mantra has become "how bad do you want this" and my head is willing me to push on and to run faster. As we come up the final hill to the finish I feel a surge of energy return to my legs, I’m yelling a new mantra in my head “I DON’T FEEL NO HILL!” One of the runners next to me smiles as I pass her and says “great job, go get it,” it was at this point that I realized I wasn’t just saying my mantra in my head. I don’t care anymore, I’m feeling good again. I push myself up the hill and into the stadium where my 4 year old is waiting. I wave to him as I expend every ounce of energy to cross the finish line as fast as I can. A quick glance at my watch shows me 56:01 which is a personal record (PR) for me despite being a little higher than both my goal and my prediction. This is an unofficial time as the Bolder Boulder has yet to give out official times and splits. It might be time to call the new timing technology a massive failure since I was supposed to get my time and splits 20 minutes after finishing.
I'll try to write something about the post race expo and activities at some point in the next few days, but I think I've rambled on long enough for now. Also, my official time, splits and race pictures will be posted as they become available to me.
UPDATED: Official Time of 56:00. Splits added above.
Friday, May 25, 2007
Video found and posted on the Runners World Forums by 'backinthesaddleagain' whose blog you can read here, and I recommend that you do.
I personally have some questions about naked running. For example, how do you... I mean... wouldn’t your... you know... hmm, I’m not quite sure how to ask that one. Something easier perhaps, can you wear running shoes? Where do you carry the timing tag? Wait, don’t answer that. I’m trying to have this blog be a PG-13 kid friendly blog, but we might have crossed that line already. As a firm believer in the 1st Rule of Holes* I’m just going to stop now.
For the record I do not run naked except when the phone rings while I’m in the shower.
*1st Rule of Holes: When you find yourself in one, stop digging!
PAINFUL UPDATE: When driving to your nudist race please be careful not to slam your junk in the car door as this poor man did. How’s that even possible?
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Mile 1 - 8:25 Total 8:25
Mile 2 - 8:45 Total 17:10
Mile 3 - 9:27 Total 26:37
Mile 4 - 9:17 Total 35:54
Mile 5 - 8:39 Total 44:33
Mile 6 - 8:52 Total 53:25
Final 0.2 - 1:43 Total 55:08
Final time 55:08. First thought as I check my watch: “you couldn’t have shaved 9 seconds off that?” In the end I’ll be happy with that result, but I’ll be kicking myself for not knocking off an additional 9 seconds to finish in under 55. Doesn't 54:59 sound so much better than 55:08?
On Monday afternoon or Tuesday morning I’ll have a detailed (read: long and boring) post race report including my actual splits and final time. Hopefully, I’ll also have pictures for those of you who are more visual and less intellectual. That’s right dear readers, I just insulted you. Mocking your small reader base is a great way to grow your blog, everyone knows we lash out at the ones we love.
I welcome all of your predictions in the comments. Have a safe and happy Memorial Day and if you’re not busy Monday morning, my wife and I could really use a ride to the race to save us from parking and shuttling in.
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
The article claims that almost all elite distance runners have a stride rate of roughly 180, which means that every minute they take 180 strides or steps. For the mathematically challenged among you that equates to 3 steps per second, or so my calculator tells me. I personally don’t put a lot of faith in that calculator because just the other day I asked it what 1,329,502 * 4 was and it told me “BOOBIES,” which is the answer to many of life’s questions and while it caused me to giggle like a schoolboy reading Moby Dick for the first time, I’m quite sure it’s not the right answer.
Getting back on track, my natural stride rate is around 160, which is a good indication that I’m not an elite athlete. Also a good indication: body fat percentage of 22%, a diet that includes hot waffle sandwiches and feet named 'slow poke' and 'molasses'. Despite all these inadequacies, I have on a couple of occasions shortened my stride and managed to get to 180 strides per minute. I was able to do this for a couple of miles at a time and it resulted in significantly faster times, the downside was that my legs got tired a lot quicker and felt sore in places they don’t usually. I doubt that 5 days before a race is a good time to start messing with your stride, but it’s definitely something that I’m going to look into after the Bolder Boulder.
*tee hee* BOOBIES and Moby Dick all in the same post. *snicker*
Alright, how many of you grabbed your calculator and multiplied 1,329,502 by 4?
Monday, May 21, 2007
I have since gone 3 straight days without running. Saturday morning I couldn’t even put weight on it, but I’m walking normally now. If I believed in karma then this would clearly be due to my mocking my coworker’s injury, but I don’t believe in karma so it’s not. This is all just great timing too because I’m running a 10K in a week, and according to this article on Cool Running your body can lose running fitness quickly.
After all the time and energy and miles you have invested to get it into shape, your body will thank you by forgetting it all at the earliest opportunity. It's a difficult truth: you lose fitness quickly when you stop all training.This is good news indeed! It means that I’ll be back in top form
A general rule of thumb is that it takes about two weeks of "retraining" to come back from every week in which you do no exercise.
2 weeks after the race. Fantastic!
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Week of 5/13 through 5/19
Tue 5/15 - Tempo Run 8 miles total inc 6 miles @ 9 min/mile pace
Thu 5/17 - Easy Run 3 miles @ 10 min/mile pace
Total Miles: 11 miles
I rolled my ankle on Friday playing indoor soccer so I missed my final run this week which would have been my long run.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
I’ve commented on Fergie’s running attire in a previous post and I don’t want to get repetitive here, but for crying out loud I’m worried about tripping over that headphone cord. My guess is that Fergie is training for a marathon or possibly a half-marathon because you see a lot of these pictures of her and her oversize headphones and shades all over the celeb gossip blogs. I mean... someone told me that you can find these pictures all over the celeb gossip blogs... I don’t read celeb gossip blogs... I’m too busy watching daytime television for that.
Quick observation: How bad would it suck to have the paparazzi driving along side you taking pictures every time you went running? Every time you stopped to walk, every time you tripped, every time you gave a quick farmer’s blow, every time you had to pull your underwear out of your crack... I’ve said too much haven’t I?
Anyway, if Fergie is training for some kind of race then I wish her the best. It’s easy to sit behind my computer and make fun of celebrities, and I guess that’s what I like about it. It’s easy sitting here, making fun of others.
Picture "found" at Skinny Celebrities and many thanks to Bolder in Boulder who gave me the 'farmer's blow' picture even though he probably doesn't know it yet.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
While it was encouraging to run 6 miles at close to my goal pace it was a little discouraging how tired it made me feel and I couldn’t escape the thought that if I’d have been running outside I would have slowed down. As I mentioned, the good thing about the treadmill (if there is one) is that when you set it to a 9 minute mile pace you have to keep running at that speed or you fall off the back and hurt yourself. Especially, if you live dangerously like I do and don’t clip the safety key/kill switch to your shirt. I find that living on the edge like that keeps me sharp. I’ll leave my seatback slightly reclined during takeoff and landing without batting an eyelid, and I even signed the waiver on the back of my race bib without reading it! You know what I waived? Me either! Seriously, I didn’t read it and I think I’m the better for it.
With this tempo run over my tapering has officially started (see previous post) and that really sucks because it means that I’m running less which in turn means that I’m burning less calories than I’m used to. I have more free time because I’m not running as often or as far in the evenings, but the one thing that I do to fill my free time is eat, and that’s going to hurt me.
Today’s Tags brought to you by the letter T.
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Every now and then I like to pretend that I'm 'down' with the younger crowd, but I'm a 31 year old white guy who just tried to drop the word 'shizzle' in his blog. If that doesn’t scream geek then I don’t know what does. In fact, if I tried any harder I'd be an ESPN TV personality, so please don't encourage this behavior by leaving me any comments.
On a running note (imagine that on a running blog), I'm beginning to taper my running in preparation for the Bolder Boulder and probably won't get in any more long runs. Two weeks might be a little far out to taper for a 10K but I've struggled on my long runs lately and have had some minor knee pain that I'm leery of.
Here's my running schedule for the next two weeks:
Today: 8 total miles including 6 tempo miles.
Thu 5/17: 5 miles easy
Sat 5/19: 3 miles easy (may bump this up to 4 or 5)
Mon 5/21: 5 total miles including 3 tempo miles
Wed 5/23: 3 miles easy
Thu 5/24: 3 miles easy
UPDATE: Here's a picture of my better half modeling the shirt (click to enlarge)
Monday, May 14, 2007
On to the contents of my bag:
1 Cotton T-Shirt – Excellent! I judge my competence as a runner by the number of race T-shirts I acquire.
1 Bib – ME646 is my number – “I am not a number I’m a free man!”
3 Safety Pins – Maybe the 4th corner of the bib is self-adhesive or something.
1 Timing Tag – A lot smaller than I had imagined. “Operation Kick Me” is going to be easier than I had initially thought.
Countless Coupons/Propaganda – $10 to a sporting goods store and 25% off running shoes, both with all kinds of restrictions. $15 off a massage, happy ending not included, more restrictions.
1 Bolder Boulder 2007 Registration Form – In case I picked up my race packet prior to registering?
1 Bolder Boulder Wall Calendar – Begins in April of ’07 and ends in March ’08. “You want to see the end of 2008 you’d better sign up for the Bolder Boulder again next year.”
*Other terms and conditions most certainly apply. New low APR only applies to purchases made on the 31st of each month and restrictions include blah blah blah...
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Week of 5/6 through 5/12
Wed 5/9 - Speedwork 6 miles total inc 6x800 meters @ 8:00 min/mile pace w/ 400 meter jogs
Fri 5/11 - Easy Run 4 miles @ 10 min/mile pace
Sat 5/12 - Easy Run 6 miles @ 10 min/mile pace
Total Miles: 16 miles
My training plan is from the Runners World Smart Coach.
Friday, May 11, 2007
1. Set a goal for myself
(b) Make it public so as to hold myself accountable (yes, this counts as making it public)
3. Impress my boss who is always encouraging me to set goals.
The question is should I set an attainable goal so that I feel like I've accomplished something? Or should I set the impossible, impractical, upper-management-thinks-we-should-do-this goal that will push me harder but make it look like I’ve failed at the end. To resolve this inner dilemma, this inner struggle between lazy and motivated, I’m going to set a stretch goal to push myself and an easy goal so I can feel good about myself. Running is all about feeling good.
My time in 2006 was 58:53, almost 8 minutes faster than in 2005, so if I could cut another 8 minutes off my time this year that would put me at 50 minutes. This translates to 8 minute miles and according to the McMillan Running Calculator my workouts are not fast enough to believe that I could accomplish this. I actually think I heard it laughing at me when I input the data, so that will be the high end goal or perhaps it’s more accurate to call it an aspiration.
On the attainable side my aspiration is that I’ll be able to run sub 9 minute miles or under 56 minutes. Plugging this into the McMillan calculator gives me results that are more inline with my current workouts. There you have it, that’s my
Thursday, May 10, 2007
As you may or may not know I myself am training for a 10K race that's coming up in less than 3 weeks, and I'm always concerned about getting injured right before a race. It's that time when you are peaking in your training and there's always that worry in the back of your head that you will suffer from an over-use injury and miss the race. Either that or you will enter the race knowing that your likelihood of walking is so high you might as well be dug in against the Yankees middle relief. But now, I don't have to worry about injury. Why you ask? Do you have any idea what the odds are of two people who work in adjacent offices both getting shin splints? They're 1 in 340,774. (This may or may not be true). It's kind of like how TSA always advises you to carry a bomb with you on the airplane (also, may or may not be true). Because again, the odds of two unconnected people both carrying bombs onto the same plane are insanely high. So if you take a bomb onto a plane and don't detonate it you're bound to have a safe flight (Definitely, not true).
So rejoice with me all you readers, rejoice at the misfortune and pain of others that all but ensures an injury free upcoming 3 weeks.
Tuesday, May 8, 2007
Monday, May 7, 2007
Here’s the breakdown of your votes from the comments:
* Kiss my Asthma! 3 votes
* You’re Losing to an Asthmatic! 2 votes
* Blow me, I’ve got Asthma! 1 vote
There was one write in vote each for fo’ Sheezy I’m Wheezy and Asthma is Sexy!
Voting was Chicago style so if you or your late grandfather voted multiple times, they were all counted. Also of note, my better half liked the “Kiss my Asthma!” idea so in reality that one had 4 votes and none of the other votes mattered one iota but it sure is nice that the votes matched the pre-determined outcome. I guess it’s kind of like an Olympic figure skating contest in that regard.
The image that you see here is the graphic that we sent to Running Banana superimposed on the shirt, it is purple to match her running skirt. I know several people mentioned that they wanted one, so if you’d like a high-res copy of the image let me know and I’ll e-mail it to you so that you can order your very own from Running Banana. Actual pictures of the shirt will be posted when it arrives.
Olympic figure skating? Running skirts and color-coordinated matching outfits? I need to stop now. Expect a more testosterone filled, manly post tomorrow.
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Week of 4/29 through 5/5
Mon 4/30 - Easy Run 2.5 miles @ 11 min/mile pace
Wed 5/2 - Easy Run 4.2 miles @ 10 min/mile pace (lots of hills)
Thu 5/3 - Easy Run 4.3 miles @ 10 min/mile pace
Sun 5/6 - Long Run 10 miles @ 10 min/mile pace
Total Miles: 21 miles
My training plan is from the Runners World Smart Coach.
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
My mistake: I ordered the Hot Waffle Ice Cream sandwich, and it was everything that I hoped it could be. Now I’d never even heard of a Hot Waffle Ice Cream sandwich prior to this, but I thought to myself “shucks, that sounds like it might be good.” Good doesn’t even begin to describe it. Since Sunday I’ve already been back there to eat it again and I’m planning on going back at least 2 more times before we leave. In short I’m going to have to put in some serious miles during this vacation in order to stay in shape.
It was at least four times as good as it sounds like it should be, and surprisingly only 23% as messy as it sounds like it should be. They should try giving those things to crack addicts to get them off the smack because I read somewhere that drug rehab is only 38% effective, but Hot Waffle Ice Cream sandwiches are over 98% effective according to my research.
As I re-read this blog entry for editing purposes (yes, believe it or not I do re-read and edit before posting) I started to think “well golly gee wilikers, what does this have to do with running?” Nutrition related? That’s pushing it. I found it during a run? A little weak. Motivation to run more? Perhaps, but essentially it come down to this: It’s my blog and this is what I’m posting today!